Hi, thanks for stopping by! I’m Jeanne, intrepid daydreamer, sharing my thoughts and experiences about this Happy Life we all seek. Join the discussion, challenge my thoughts, share your wisdom!
What do I want to be when I grow up?
Which road should I take?
I don’t know what to wear!
Do I take this job or that job?
Where do I want to live?
Ah, decisions, decisions! Or, in my world where a different word is used, ah! Choices, choices! Don’t we make choices every single moment of our lives? You bet. Every day we choose to respond to the alarm clock (or not), get to work on time (or not). . .
As children, we chose to obey (or not), to eat our vegetables, brush our teeth, take our baths, be nice to our friends, gentle with animals, respectful of elders — or not, or not, or not . . .
In making our choices we spend our lives defining ourselves. Who we are. We build our character, set the stage, create our drama. And over time, we graduate from making the choices we’re supposed to make, to making choices we want to make. At least, that’s the way it can be.
Some of us, however, as adults continue to make the choices others want us to make, or think we should make. We live our lives according to someone else’s rules. We chase the dreams of another because they want us to. We strive to live up to the expectations of others.
Others, others, others! When do I get to be / do / feel / think the way I want to? Aha! It’s choice time, yet again. We get to live OUR lives when we decide to. When we choose to. How very hard that can be, when the others express disappointment, or fear for our welfare, or skepticism; especially when the others are important to us, are folks we care about, love, and want in our lives.
We don’t want our important others to be wringing their hands or shaking their fingers at us, or sullenly waiting to be able to say I told you so when we fail (if we fail) in chasing our own dreams. We want moral support, and Go Get ‘Em messages, and encouragement. But, if we are being our very authentic selves, the presence or absence of friendly support makes no difference to us, because we make our choices now based on our self-love.
Exactly that and only that. Have you not noticed that those who are living their dream, or are on the definitive road to living their dream, kind of glow in the dark? Their smiles are so genuine! Their laughter so contagious! Their caring about others so embracing! They are bigger people with more of themselves to give because they are happy people with healthy, expansive psyches.
Oh, and yes — they don’t put much stock in negative thinking.
About my flower friend in the picture, the friend that started me thinking along these lines: apparently this little flower, bred to be a Candystripe Zinnia, somehow felt a loyalty to the normal one-color zinnia in its gene pool. Ah, which to be, which to be? My little friend decided to be half of both. But hey, if that brings happiness then go for it (it certainly brings attention!) 
Related posts:
- Our Developing Selves
- From Bad, to Good, to — EUREKA!
- Two Lives, Unmet
- Why We Do the Things We Do
- How Come Some Dreams Don’t Come True?
Tags: attitude, choices, growth, thinking positive
Categories: Personal Growth
Hi Jeanne,
Isn’t that the truth? It’s all about choices, and consequences – good and bad.
I agree, it’s tough when we make the decision to do something but it doesn’t align with what others think we should do. If we believe in ourselves, we should follow our heart and hopefully the others will join us on our journey – supporting us even though they think we may be making a mistake. When I think about it, it’s no different then when we give our children their wings. We pray they will make the right choices along the way, but if they don’t, they know they’ll always have a soft place to fall.
Barbara Swafford´s last blog ..A Mantra For Bloggers and Writers
Ah, Barbara — giving our children their wings, and being the soft place to fall! Yes to that — if we can give our children their wings, can’t we give them to ourselves as well? I celebrate all who’ve done that, and encourage all who want to!
Jeanne,
read this with my breakfast coffee – i agree – finding one’s own path takes a lot of wisdom and trust in one’s own gut sense – and when you do carve out your own path – OMG! yes, so true – you do glow in the dark, you have a more open sense of self – and more to give to others because you yourself are fulfilled – what a great post, thanks Jeanne!
Marcella Corroeli Jager´s last blog ..Exhausted but uplifted
Marcella, you say it good! Wisdom and trust in the gut feelings. I raise my coffee cup in a toast to glowing in the dark
Dear Jeanne, I was all set to say, “but, but, but sometimes because we are in a marriage we have to make compromises for what we want vis a vis what our partner wants, until you reminded me I can soar in ways that matter to me with positive thinking!!
xo
Jannie Funster´s last blog ..A Photography “Before-And-After” Blog Post Wherein I Avail Myself Of Corel Paint Shop Pro’s “Clone Brush” Feature To Camouflage A Parking Lot And Beautify The Lawn In A Photo Of Kelly At Age 5 Atop That Really Cool Round Stone Mosaic Thing Outside Austin’s Blanton Art Museum- A Post With Absolutely Zero Words — A Total First For Me-
Exactly, what you said . . .
Choices are always so much more interesting when not dictated by our previous learning (eg don’t touch the hot things, they burn – easy choice). I am a risk taker, it influences the choices I make. Others are not, and therefore make the ‘safe’ choice (or the one they know most about at least!)
Enjoy the journey.
Mandy
Mandy Allen´s last blog ..Who have you inspired
Hi, Mandy — nice to see a new face! You’re right about the risk-takers, and I look forward to learning more about your risk-taking!
The horse really caught my eye . . .
Most of us wear mask all our lives and it is understandable that we do this because we want to have a sense of belonging. However, our individuality suffers from this need to belong. I do understand that being creatures of nature, we follow certain instincts that secures the furtherance of our survival but at the expense of suppressing our authenticity. This is the reason why we put much weight on the expectation of others as well as the systems we are into.
Emancipating from a common mindset takes awareness on our part. The moment we discover that we have the power to influence our reality, we can do wonders.
Walter´s last blog ..7 characteristics of a loser
Walter, your last paragraph says it SO succinctly!
Hi Jeanie,
Long time no speak! Love this article and all the wisdom it contains. You are a star of the blogging world and you glow!
Jacqui
formerly known as uplift antidote
oooh i sound like prince, all i need now is a symbol
Jacqui´s last blog ..Park Bench
Hooray, Jacqui! I wondered where you’d gone off to! Can’t wait to see your new place.
Yes, princelike, why don’t you run a contest for that symbol you need?!?